Tourist Traps

• By Editor
• A Fool in Paradise | Nightlife | Opinion
• 91 days ago
• 8

Last year I read a CNN article headed “World’s 12 Worst Tourist Traps”, calling them the “devil’s dozen of overpriced, underwhelming sites.”  The article began with; “We’ve all experienced tourist traps.  Those heavily advertised attractions that turn out to be bland misrepresentations of the places we’re supposed to be seeing.  Expensive time eaters that leave us with lighter wallets and a taste of burnt coffee in our mouths.”

Most of the Tourist Traps mentioned were places I have never been to, so I could not comment.  However, I did agree with a couple of entries on their list.

Personally, I have two lists; a Bucket List and a WOFTAM list.  A Bucket List Item, is somewhere I really want to see before I die, like in the 2007 movie ‘The Bucket List’ starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.  I need to see it for myself even though I may have been warned that it is a disappointment.  I am prepared to spend the time and money just to say that I have been there.

A ‘Waste Of F***ing Time And Money’ is self-descriptive; a true tourist trap and a place that I regret ever having gone to.  Unfortunately, without the advantage of foresight, many places on my ‘Bucket List’ have turned into WOFTAMs.

Like seeing the Mona Lisa painting in the flesh.  What a disappointment.  It was behind glass and barricades and is so small you needed binoculars to see it.  If I was going to buy a painting for a squillion dollars, I would want the thing to be a couple of storey’s high.  At least there would be some value in the amount of paint the artist used.

Visiting Stonehenge in England was equally deflating.  I recall travelling for hours to a cold, miserable, windy spot in the middle of nowhere to see a pile of rocks.

Like looking from the top of the Eiffel Tower.  Nice view but having been there and done that, I never want to do it again.

I agree with the CNN article’s assessment of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.  :  “The Leaning Tower of Pisa may have an interesting history, but as a tourist attraction there isn’t much to say about it.  Apart from the fact that it actually leans.  After the initial wonderment over how such bad architecture has managed to last so long, there’s nothing much left to do apart from climbing the tower.  But that’s not before you stand in a long line of tourists willing to part with 15 euros for the opportunity to climb 300 dizzying spiral steps within a specified time slot.”

What about tourist traps in this part of the world?  I can think of two right off the top of my head.  Vientiane, the capital of Laos is a non-event and the only reason to go there would be for a visa run from Thailand.  The city boasts colonial architecture and the Mekong River, both of which can be better appreciated in other cities in Southeast Asia.

And Manila, the capital of the Philippines, is a dirty, congested, overpopulated, polluted dump with no redeeming features.  Nothing to see and nothing to do.

What about in Thailand?  In a country that boasts so many tourist visitors and so much culture, surely there must be some lemons among the heavily touted offerings.  Here are two possibilities:

Patpong in Bangkok is a WOFTAM in every sense.  The only reason I ever go to Patpong is to dine at Mizu’s Japanese restaurant which has wonderful food.  Even the CNN article declared: “Patpong is touted as Bangkok’s red light district for expats and tourists.  In reality it’s about as sexy as an Australian sheila drunk on Two Dogs.”

Patong Beach, Phuket, is another overpriced tourist trap.  Everything there, from the beach to the shopping to the bars, can be found better and much cheaper elsewhere in Thailand.

It would be interesting to find out from other people (hint, hint!) the places they considered to be tourist traps or worse.  After all, those mentioned above are just my opinion, and I have been known to be wrong.